Where They Belong - Aeryn Rudel

‍ ‍Content Note: death, violence, gore

Daddy always says to put things where they belong. Toys have to go back in the chest. Milk has to go back in the fridge. Dead people have to go in the ground. 

The gun is really heavy, and I have to carry it with both hands. Daddy showed me how to work it, how to make the round thing pop out and how to put in the bullets. Before all the bad things happened, he said I was still too little to shoot. He said it might knock me down. Maybe he was just saying that to scare me so I wouldn’t try to play with the gun.

I carry the gun into the family room where Mommy is lying in front of the TV. I don’t want to look at her because it might make me cry again. I can’t cry now. I need to be a big boy so I can help Daddy. There is blood all over the carpet, and there are pieces of Mommy missing, the pieces Daddy ate. I walk past her into the kitchen without looking. 

Anna is on the floor in the kitchen. She was so little that she couldn’t even run when Daddy grabbed her. Her blood is all over and what Daddy did to her is worse than Mommy. It doesn’t bother me to look at her, though. I feel sad, but I didn’t love Anna the same way I loved Mommy. 

The basement door is next to the fridge, and it is open a little. I can hear Daddy in the basement. It sounds like he is moving things, heavy things, maybe throwing them. I push open the door and look down the stairs. I don’t like the dark, and I switch on the light. I have to stand on my tippy toes to do it. I’m scared Daddy might come up the stairs when the light goes on, but he doesn’t. He is still moving around down there, making loud noises. It sounds like he is crying or breathing really hard. 

I walk down the stairs. I try to be very quiet because I don’t want Daddy to hear me yet. I get to the bottom, and I see Daddy next to the washer and the dryer. I also see Sylvester, our cat. Daddy is trying to grab him, but Sylvester is way back under the washer and Daddy can’t reach him.

“Hi Daddy,” I say. 

Daddy turns around. He looks sick. His skin is gray, and his eyes are yellow. There is blood on his face and on his shirt. I know that blood is not his, and it makes my stomach hurt. He opens his mouth and growls, like a monster. He doesn’t say any words. I don’t think he can say words anymore. I start moving backward up the stairs. 

“Come on, Daddy,” I say. “Come out of the basement. Come be with Mommy.”

Daddy follows me up the stairs and into the kitchen. I back up against the counter and hold out the gun with both hands. I aim it at Daddy. He walks slowly toward me. His mouth is open and black stuff is running out of it. He reaches for me. 

“I’m sorry, Daddy.”  

I pull the trigger, and the gun makes the loudest sound I have ever heard, and it jumps hard in my hands. The bullet hits Daddy in the head and makes a big hole. Blood and yellow stuff, like oatmeal, splashes the wall behind him. He stands there looking at me, but I don’t think he sees me anymore. Then he falls down and stops moving. 

I think it’s okay to cry now. 

#

It was easy to pick up Anna, but Mommy and Daddy were too heavy to move. I tried, but I couldn’t get them outside. I got blood on my new shirt. The one Mommy bought me for the first day of second grade. Mommy would be so mad if she knew, even though there’s probably no school anymore. 

I found a shovel in the garage. Digging was hard, and it took me a long time to make a hole in the backyard because I had to dig through the grass. I put Anna in the hole, and then I felt bad that she had to be in there by herself. I got Mommy’s purse and Daddy’s watch and the picture we took at Disneyland with all of us in it, and I put them in the hole with Anna. Then I put the dirt in. I tried not to put it on Anna’s face at first, but I had to, and it made me feel a little better when I couldn’t see her anymore. 

When I was done, I went into the front yard. I can see the city, and there is a lot of smoke. Yesterday, I heard sirens, but now I don’t hear anything but the wind. I wonder if other people will come to get me. I wonder if there are any other people left. 

I go back into the backyard, and I lie down on top of the dirt where the hole was. I whisper, “Goodbye, Mommy. Goodbye, Daddy. Goodbye, Anna.” 

I think about what Daddy always said. Everything has to go where it belongs. I think Daddy, Mommy, and Anna are where they belong now. I hope they go to heaven. I hope I go there too. I hope it is soon. 

Originally published by DarkFuse Magazine, June 2016

Aeryn Rudel is a writer from Tacoma, Washington. He is the author of the baseball horror novella Effectively Wild, the Iron Kingdoms Acts of War novels, and the flash fiction collection Night Walk & Other Dark Paths. His short stories have appeared in Factor Four Magazine, On Spec, and Pseudopod, among others. Learn more about Aeryn's work at www.rejectomancy.com or on Bluesky @aerynrudel.bsky.social